Girl Wears Maxi Dress to Wedding. Bad things happen.

06/26/2013 14:28

I attended my neighbors wedding this weekend.  It was a very nice affair, but there's one thing you need to know about Alison.  She's a really great woman, but she's a little insecure.  And by that I mean extremely.  The big day was going fine, even though she was a nervous wreck that the florals wouldn't show up on time, and the band leader definitely seemed drunk.  Plus the in-laws hate her family on account of some racist things that were said, then written on a brick that went through someone's window.  Long story for another post.  So if she was anxious, it's not without some justification.  Anyway, all seemed to be going well until a little girl showed up to the ceremony wearing a maxi dress like this.  Maxi dresses can be visually stunning on account of how chic and on trend they are, and this dress was no exception.   Here's what happened.  


The bride didn't like how much attention this girl was getting because of the maxi she was wearing.  This was supposed to be her special day, and naturally she wanted all eyes on her dress, not the maxi dress.   So Ally asked one of her bridesmaids if she could convince the girl to change out of the maxi.  Naturally, the friend wouldn't oblige.  I mean, would you have?!  That's when Allison approached me with the same task.  She handed me a waiters uniform she took from the caterer and asked me to tell the girl to change out of her maxi dress and into the plain, white frock.  Now, I've done some crazy things in my lifetime.  And I'm certainly no stranger to being a complete asshole.  I've said and done some truly reprehensible things.  But even this was below me.    I told her to be patient, and that after a little while, everyone's fascination with the girl in the maxi dress would die down, and revert back to where she wanted it.  But I couldn't have been more wrong.  Soon the photographer.  And when the singer announced it was time for the first dance, everyone started cheering for the maxi girl to take the stage.  When the happy couple did instead, everyone started booing.  I was so mortified for the woman.  But to be fair, this maxi dress really was very stunning.  

The party broke up at around 11 pm, and everyone asked the girl in the maxi dress where the "afterparty" was.  She said she was planning on going home and just surfing the internet to buy more maxi dresses.  A dozen or so people thought that was a great idea, so they hijacked the limo that was supposed to be for the honeymoon, and all the guests just drove to her house instead, and sat on the bed while she showed them a favorite site for girls maxi dresses.  This is the link if you want to see it.