An Open Letter to Edward Snowden re: girls capri leggings

07/11/2013 11:31
Dear Edward Snowden,
It is my understanding that you're in a heap of trouble with the United States government for giving away some secrets.  That's too bad.  I hope everything works out for everyone, but I'm not optimistic, which is unusual because that is my default setting.  So now your'e looking for a country that will take you in.  Have you tried the Republic of Texas?  You'd have to learn a whole new culture, but just thought I'd ask.  Also, you are probably packing light these days on account of you being on the run.  Or is it lamb?  Might I make a recommendation?  As an eleven year old girl, I always travel with at least two pairs of girls capri leggings (not dissimilar to this kind.)  Capri leggings for girls are a critical addition to anyone's ensemble because they are so versatile.  They can be dressed up to go to a fancy event, or worn to more casual settings.  A girl can wear them under a skirt or dress, or alone.  Something you might want to consider if you're running from the Soviets.  
Girls capri leggings are a terrific addition to your wardrobe.  Not that many people know that, so I hope you can keep a secret.  There are lots of great website where you can buy capri leggings from, but I'm going to tell you my favorite one, knowing full well that if I tell you, you'll tell the world and this company will become big and famous, and thereby be able to offer us even more versions of their leggings.  It's called TwirlyGirl and they manufacture all of their clothes in the USA.  Now I know you're not a big fan of America right now, but don't let color your perception of them.  All of their clothes are super soft and comfy, and they have great customer service.  So if you have any problems, they can help you out.  Well, within reason.  It's not like they can offer you asylum or anything.  Have you tried Rhode Island?  I know it's small over there, but at least it's tropical, right?  I bet they have coconut trees on every corner, and the waters are as blue as you can imagine.
So order some girls capri leggings.  I'm sure you'll find them quite useful.  I'm including a link to the TwirlyGirl website.  It's a terrific place to poke around.  Probably even more fun than the Duty Free Shop in the Moscow airport.